If only this park weren't so green and loud and swirly I might actually like walking, I thought.
I think lots of things that are inappropriate and unintelligent. I bet that everyone does. If only we all said exactly what we thought. I tried it once, for experiment's sake.
I told a woman in line at the Grocery to 'Move it or Lose it'.
Let's just say, if looks could kill, you woudn't be reading this right now. She was livid. I meant it, however. I meant that if she didn't 'move it' that she would most assuredly 'lose it.' I'd make her 'lose it.' Lose what?
Well, that was up to her, and how she wanted to play her hand.
I then made matters worse, however, by acting like I didn't say anything. She looked directly at me, which I took as my cue to conjure up my phone and fake an incoming call.
Now that's a trick that works pretty damn well. Fake a call.
Other things we probably shouldn't do but we do anyway? Make friends with a stranger. Talk to the smelly kid. Light a fire in an enclosed space. Leave the oven on. Forget where you parked. Skip out on the tab.
Don't look back. Look both ways. Take a deep breath. Blink, and you'll miss it.
Life is just full of contradictory nonsense, isn't it?
At the end of the day, the only things of substance and purpose are the elegant and whimsically glorious arrangements of one Mr. Barry Manilow.
He preaches and I listen. I think you should, too.
For instance, turn on 'Copacabana.' Listen to it. REALLY listen:
'At the Copa-Copacabana. The hottest spot north of Havana.'
Do you see? Just listen.
He speaks volumes with one foul swoop of quill and ink.
'Her name is Lola, she was a showgirl.'
She WAS a showgirl, Lola.